Unemployed? Friendless? It doesn't matter why you have so much free time, these great blogs will help you waste away the tedious hours you have left on this earth.

March 26, 2009

10 reasons that we should build a border fence between Florida and the rest of us.

1. Lionel Tate - life sentence without parole at 12 years of age for a WWF related rough-housing that resulted in death.
2. Elián González
3. Parrot-heads
4. Terry Shiavo
5. Crazy astronauts in diapers
6. Dead mother social security checks
7. George W. Bush/Al Gore voting
8. Mark Foley (Congressman with hot-pants for pages.)
9. Katherine Harris (she merits her own listing since she's continued to be a typical Floridian since 2000.)
10. Caylee and Haleigh's parents

To be continued . . .


  1. I agree whole heartily with building the fence because of the parrot-heads. For some reason or another, thousands have escaped an are now living in Arizona. I can live with them.

  2. What the heck are parrot heads?
    And I disagree about astronauts- we should all wear diapers, level the playing field.

  3. For our South African friends, Parrot Heads are people who drink rum and yell WOOOOOOO! a lot. You can spot them by their inappropriately chosen Hawaiian shirts and flip flops. They are indigenous to southern Florida but specimens tend to pop up throughout the US as if to remind us that Florida is a state of mind.

  4. I misspoke in my previous comment - I CAN'T live with them. One more round of Margaritaville and I'll explode.

  5. All that gray chest hair poking out of Hawaiian shirts is hard to handle. And the men are annoying too.