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June 17, 2009

Oh please, please, please. Let one of these things happen on the final episode of I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here.

1. Heidi and Spencer will be held to the standards of the real world rather than MTV's The Real World. In the real world, worthless show-offs are shunned and pelted with rotten vegetables. In The Real World being a worthless show-off is every audience member's greatest dream.
2. Patti Blagojevich will go on a curse-filled tirade and decide to make the camp her permanent home because living in the Costa Rican jungle is preferable to life with Rod.
3. Janice Dickinson's lips continue absorbing her brain until she is not just an idiot, but an idiot who is no longer capable of sharing her idiocy with the rest of us.
4. Congress will pass legistlation that compels Stephen Baldwin to keep his shirt on whenever a camera is capable of capturing an image that will curdle our collective stomachs.
5. Lou Diamond Phillip's agent and manager will be flown into the jungle camp and stoned for convincing him to do something that is beneath him. (I'm not saying he's a megastar but he is talented enough to have options.)
6. Pfizer will create a drug that allows idiots to fully perceive reality.

1 comment:

  1. I wish you would stop being so clever and witty ..!

    Pfizer ... I thought that PCP was that the drug of choice to do that ..!