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September 28, 2009

Advice to hippies

1. Take a few moments away from protesting globalization to take a bath.
2. Dancing is the rhythmic or artistic interpretation of music, not that thing you do at Dave Matthews concerts.
3. In your living will, you should explain all of your tattoos so that your grandchildren will know what unimportant things you committed your mind to in your younger days.
4. Rastafari is an Afrocentric religious movement which rejects Western culture and not a cracker, hemp-based lifestyle that encourages one to stop washing or combing their hair.
5. Dogs do not like to wear neckerchiefs and to go to music festivals. The same is true of parrots and iguanas.

4 comments:

  1. All five of these went over the fence!!

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  2. Thanks Big Mark. This will help balance all of the strike outs.

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  3. I kind of remember being at a couple of "Dead" shows where I danced uncontrollably for days, didn't bathe nor comb my hair. Like I said, I kinda of remember.

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  4. Me Me - If you're better now that means there is a cure for hippie? Is it soap?

    ReplyDelete