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January 26, 2009

6 commercials we can all do without

1. Anything trying to convince me not to be a meth-head.
2. ANYTHING INTRODUCED BY BILLY MAYS!!!!
3. Roni Deutsch. Let me get this straight. You make enough money to owe $30,000 in taxes but you end up paying less than me thanks to Roni? Fine, but everyone who pays all of their taxes should be allowed to punch Roni Deutsch in the kidney.
4. Anything with people licking Oreo cookies. This is a fetish for 0.005% of the population and disgusting for everyone else.
5. Anything that suggests that a cartoon bear can't wipe its butt without leaving toilet paper residue.
6. Anything that takes advantage of the limited intellect of those who feel they need a hemi. Can't they just buy a typical 8-cylinder gas-guzzler and save $10,000?

Okay, Anthony Bourdain, who is on my television right now, has made listing irrelevant. He asks, "What's hot, humid and smells like a turd slathered in warm durian?" It's the Furnas hot springs which is "like a wet fart." How rank are the springs? "If you've ever nibbled egg salad scraped off someone's taint."

2 comments:

  1. Yeah, I really can't deal with Billy Mays.

    #4 & #5 - :-)

    and that's a lovely quote by Bourdain.

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  2. Huge LOL @ "This is a fetish for 0.005% of the population and disgusting for everyone else."

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