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January 29, 2009

Now that he's been removed from office and banned from holding office in Illinois, 5 ways that Rod Blagojevich can keep his personal quest for the Presidency alive.

1. He doesn't actually live or work in Springfield so there's no reason in the world that he can't keep up his Chicago-based Governorship as if nothing has changed.
2. Have an affair with Sarah Palin. Name love child Spork Palin - the part that shovels is Palin and pricks are Blagojevich.
3. He could get a job with a Chicago-area Morning Zoo radio show. They always need a mentally unstable stooge who's willing to get tazed or stand out in sub-zero weather in nothing but tightie-whities all for the chance to feel the limited spotlight of local fame.
4. Change name to Barack Obama. Hope no one notices.
5. Convince a University of Illinois professor to nominate you for the Nobel Peace Prize.

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