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March 18, 2009

6 things that Alberto Gonzeles has been up to recently.

1. Discovering that Charmin is softer and more absorbent than Constitution.
2. Negotiating an endorsement deal with Alberto VO5. Potential tagline: Eeewww, Alberto.
3. Opening a chain of Water Boarding Water Parks in time for summer. Water boarding, it seems, is a recreational activity that is good clean fun.
4. Writing a memoir to document the two or three things he remembers from his time in office.
5. Representing Dick Cheney who is being sued by Satan for copyright infringement.
6. Laughing his ass off as he enjoys his pension and life-long health care.

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