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August 2, 2009

Mydailylist's guide to understanding the symptoms of depression (and determining if you need a happy pill.)

1. Do you not want to get up in the morning to go to your soul-numbing job?
2. When meeting others, do you wish you could punch them in the face?
3. In the morning, do you have difficulty choosing between rum and corn flakes for breakfast?
4. Do you care/worry about Brangelina? Is it happy?
5. Do you deep-fry salads, Tubby?
6. Do you feel the constant pressure of writing lists?
7. Did you buy a dog so you'd have something to kick?
8. Did you get married so you'd have something to kick?
9. In recent weeks, did you feel you had no other option but to leave your position in Alaska state government?
10. When you saw the new Michael Phelps Subway commercial, did you argue to the point of tears that that song couldn't possibly be called Thank You Falettinme Be Mice Elf Agin.


  1. hahaha #2 - yes yes yes yes! Get me a doctor!

  2. 11. Do you cry at Adam Sandler movies? (and not just because of the acting?)

  3. Earl: I can bite my lip through a Sandler movie but David Spade makes me weep.

  4. If we should ever meet, I'll make sure to wear a hockey mask.

  5. Amber: don't worry, it's just wishin'